Marriage is your question? My stance on it? I made that clear in many a separate conversation, but I’m going to lay it out in sentences so you really understand.
When I said love doesn’t need a contract, I meant it. If two people are actually in love, and they decide to be together, that is all the contractual obligation there is. If the love runs out the contract is nullified or renegotiated.
But, when I said I’d marry you, I also meant that. I know you wouldn’t ask however, if we ever reached a point where you did, I would say yes. Because the original holds true, love doesn’t need a contract.
But if you wanted me to, I would be an honorable and true partner for you. As I am now, as in the first paragraph. If you felt the legitimization of our relationship was desirable i would.
Because I’m already committed to you, it wouldn’t make any difference. But I’d take your name and make it mine, with you.
But only if YOU,not me, desired it. I would also insist on a cohabitation agreement IN ANY FANTASY where one is even a thing. Your children, thier mothers, they deserve your personal empire. Me I just want to live in the castle of your heart. I want to fill a space you thought had scarred over and would never exist again. I want to fill it with my love, and our happiness. I want to inhabit places that in all your life you never knew existed, the secret passageways of your heart that you never explored, because one thing I can promise you, is that i will NEVER hurt you. You can trust me with all of you.
I need you, I need your heart and soul and love and time and arms and legs to wrap around me. I need your sweet conversation that starts the waterworks and the heart pounding, the intelligent and quick responses coming and the moisture flowing.
I need your company and your presence.
I need your love and passion.
I need your friendship and your caring.
I do not need your house, your cars,your financial support, your inheritance. Those are nothing.
You have become everything.
I need you.
I have been tricked, lied to, groomed,abused, and used. Made a slave to the industrial complex and barely squeeked by with my kids fed and the lights on.
It taught me one thing above all.
All the material is worthless, beyond basic survival of the body.
Value is found in the ethereal, the emotional, the magickal. If I thought it would buy one more hour with you I’d give my home, title and all. I’d give my 401k and stock options, I’d give both cars and my damned weekly pay. Whatever it took to experience a single hour more of the magick we create. This is my treasure.
The symptom is the sex, in my personal opinion, because we hide from verbalizing our feelings, (though less so now) and we can only truly express them physically.
Now I don’t believe the sex will ever stop improving even as we both decline, because it’s our best form of expression. But I do believe we are coming closer to a needed conversation. It will be hard. It will make things even better. Because you must trust me and I you, with the whole of ourselves.
Never Ending Love Letter 